Cri de Coeur
I am a Doctor of the Church,
no less -
once atheist,
agnostic, Manichee.
My pious mother prayed
for me to change,
attract me back
to Christianity.
But for carnal reasons
I resisted,
stayed loyal to my mistress,
stood my ground,
took time to consider
my position:
eventually God won
and I came round.
Ever since, I’ve been
the scourge of Christians,
I’ve threatened sexual sinners
with the Pit -
an irony not lost
on those who knew
that I’d both had my cake
and eaten it!
Thus my fame rests on my
cross-fingered prayer,
an all-too-human cry
that’s never met -
Please make me wholly chaste
and continent.
But do not do it yet, dear Lord,
not yet!
Page(s) 55
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