Girl is a Four-Letter Word
I’m a coward. I have no illusions.
That’s me in the corner, taking
careful notes and trusting in prudence.
Our survey said: Most women
want somebody taller, sharper, funnier
and essentially better-looking
than you. A sports car often helps.
And so does arrogance. Listen
to Steve, who told me: Her nipples
were as hard and round and pink
as bubble-gum. Listen to Richard,
who laughed and said: I loved
to feel her buck against me.
I think I’m going crazy.
Our survey said: Most men
would drag their balls through broken glass
just to jerk off over her shadow
Our survey said: Forget about it.
And she never smiles. I wonder
if she’ll smile at me today.
I wonder what it would take
for her to say: Come home
with me tonight, and maybe we
can suffer this together.
I can’t even begin to describe her.
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