Brian Docherty
Starship Personnel Manual Paras 411-415
Do not repeat mistakes of First Landing party.
Technology absence does not equate primitive.
Industrial Revolution evidence of our limitations.
Attitude equivalent: 'Machines are for monkeys'.
Imperative: discover basis of bio-habitat.
Bear in mind at all times: tall hairless bipeds
are low status workers of limited intelligence.
Do not waste time communicating with them.
On this planet, short & hairy w/ tentacles
& 6 eyes a sign of high status & genetic success.
3 repeat 3 sexes minimum requirement for
classification 'Civilised' this Star System.
Study chart of approved postures & expressions.
This combination head movements & gestures may
be read as sexual advances. If accepted, comply.
Postures 17-21 will be regarded as deadly insult.
Doing this or this could get you executed.
Never whisper. Always address the highest status
male in any gathering. Remember the agreed formula
for declining any unsuitable food or drink offered.
They are mildly telepathic. Do not be concerned.
They cannot read thoughts. Sensitive to emotions.
Do not activate any article of Earth technology
in their presence. They do not have weapons but
will win any dispute. Stay calm. Be cautious.
magazine list
- Features
- zines
- 10th Muse
- 14
- Acumen
- Agenda
- Ambit
- Angel Exhaust
- ARTEMISpoetry
- Atlas
- Blithe Spirit
- Borderlines
- Brando's hat
- Brittle Star
- Candelabrum
- Cannon's Mouth, The
- Chroma
- Coffee House, The
- Dream Catcher
- Equinox
- Erbacce
- Fabric
- Fire
- Floating Bear, The
- French Literary Review, The
- Frogmore Papers, The
- Global Tapestry
- Grosseteste Review
- Homeless Diamonds
- Interpreter's House, The
- Iota
- Journal, The
- Lamport Court
- London Magazine, The
- Magma
- Matchbox
- Matter
- Modern Poetry in Translation
- Monkey Kettle
- Moodswing
- Neon Highway
- New Welsh Review
- North, The
- Oasis
- Obsessed with pipework
- Orbis
- Oxford Poetry
- Painted, spoken
- Paper, The
- Pen Pusher Magazine
- Poetry Cornwall
- Poetry London
- Poetry London (1951)
- Poetry Nation
- Poetry Review, The
- Poetry Salzburg Review
- Poetry Scotland
- Poetry Wales
- Private Tutor
- Purple Patch
- Quarto
- Rain Dog
- Reach Poetry
- Review, The
- Rialto, The
- Second Aeon
- Seventh Quarry, The
- Shearsman
- Smiths Knoll
- Smoke
- South
- Staple
- Strange Faeces
- Tabla Book of New Verse, The
- Thumbscrew
- Tolling Elves
- Ugly Tree, The
- Weyfarers
- Wolf, The
- Yellow Crane, The