Poetry Magazines - The best collection of poetry magazines online - Simon Armitage

she remembered him mostly
coming across the fields from school
winter evenings
anorak half off his shoulder
school bag bouncing patches of colour
in the half dark world
orange licks of light in the sky
behind the swollen pale grey
of clouds

perhaps, though, it was late autumn
not the mid-
december depth of winter when
she would drive to the village
the light lost already as they came out of school

he must have been eleven
last year at primary school
unruly hair, unruly clothing
no one he needed to tidy himself for
certainly not her

in her picture he walked alone
although more often than not
she reminded herself
he came home with one of the other children
or brought a friend
no, she imagined him
alone because he really was
and that protective skin
allowing no one, none of his friends
to see, to touch the person inside
extended even to her

she’d watched him
though it wasn’t in his nature
ward off the bullies by learning to fight
she’d noticed how he deliberately
at great pains made
many friends
so no one would mock the loner

he’d worked hard at school
but not too hard
joined in the football, the fights
but something very different
moved inside him, she
knew instinctively, she
felt it only when he was alone
something in his eyes
even in his voice

he’d been there was it seven years
and then by chance he’d met his mother again
and gone back to her - she’d tried
not to blame him, but
it had hurt inside

he’d kept in touch for a year or so
had been back to visit several times
even less happy than before
but he didn’t need to tell her
he’d made his choice

now after all the years
she saw him clearly in her mind
crossing the wintry field
and wondered what had happened to him
even was he still alive
of all the many children she’d fostered
he was the one who
was with her still