Goodrest Farm
The flies from the styes
preferred her kitchen
and even on hot summer days
she sipped strong mulled beer.
They lived at Goodrest Farm –
which her husband explained
was so called due to it being
one of the places where overnight
King Charles had broken his flight
from the battle at Worcester
though she didn’t agree
‘Don’t listen to him.
This time of year
it’s just a tale
pig-men tell the auctioneer –
and Sonny Jim don’t need
patched thatch in his ears.
You believe me,
no matter how tired he’d be
King Charles couldn’t have slept
long in that rats-nest
up our stairs.
You’d best take such lies
back to their styes
along with your pig-flies
before what’s left of breakfast
gets swilled by me and the lad here –
hadn’t he, m’dear?’
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