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Ann Gray

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Forgive me

(for Medbh)

Mother, I read to the enemy,
in code, but the blues and greens
were shining through.
He painted me.  I kissed him lightly
on the cheek.  I wrote ‘the most
beloved’ on the whiteness of the page.

Mother, I sat before the enemy.
I answered questions.  I was careful.
When I thought they understood me
I changed the answers.  I told them
I was in love with my father,
I didn’t have a language.

We were alone in the restaurant.
He ate from his plate and thieved
from mine.  He cracked the shell
of my chocolate with a thin silver
spoon.  He touched the apple silk
I was wearing with his fingers.

Mother, I spent the evening with
the enemy.  I climbed the stairs
not once, but several times.
I wrote ‘I hope I see you again’
on the whiteness of the page.
In the darkness of the alleyways
I let him kiss me, take both
my breasts in his hands.

Page(s) 21

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