Thomas McColl
I
For assuming
that I am the most important person in the human race,
the gods have announced
demotion of my I to lower case.
i have not been told when this will take place,
but by stating that, i realise now there is no need.
i have begun my sentence
in the previous sentence.
The gods and Descartes in Nirvana have decreed
i think (only of myself),
therefore i am (no longer denoted by a capital i).
i cannot hear the difference,
but i can see
the gods have made me half the i
i used to be.
i, Claudius.
Damn! The gods are not fooled by an alias.
How vain must e.e. cummings have been,
to pay so dearly for his crime?
The gods have informed me
i will be allowed an exclamation mark for good behaviour
while i am serving out my time.
An i followed by an exclamation mark
is almost a capital i,
just once removed.
As soon as my application
to be the most important person in the human race
has been approved,
i’ll demand back my capital i
complete with exclamation mark
as compensation,
so everyone can clearly see
the gods at last are pleased with me.
Page(s) 32-33
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